Monday, 18 May 2015

Being a Mum of 2 is ......

Image courtesy of davidduke.com





Damn. Being a Mum of two is hard. Now I was under no illusion that of course it would be but I think I'd perhaps convinced myself that it can't be that hard? I mean, what on earth do those people do that have more than two children, they cope don't they???


I feel I'm turning into one of those frazzled Mum's, you know the ones you see that look like the walking dead, with no real clue what day it is let alone what year. So many people have said to me 'the second is much easier' and I mean SO many people and I guess yes she is a little bit easier than Alfie but she's still very demanding! Plus I think you forget about alot of things that come with looking after a baby and I think she's taking after her brother and wanting to spend more time awake than asleep, those people that say that babies are easy because they sleep all the time, pahhh who you are kidding you haven't seen my kids!!


It's really quite hard to adapt from suddenly going from one little body to two, you can mentally prep before hand but physically it's quite tricky, I don't know how to divide myself, how can I give Alfie attention when I'm feeding Elarna when he suddenly decides he wants to have a cuddle or to play but then have to tell him that I'll be a minute or he'll have to hold on, it's something that we're both not used to, I then have to deal with tears or a tantrum as he doesn't get why all of a sudden Mummy's attention is else where when it used to be dedicated all to just him. I confess, I forgot just how a newborn can take up so much of your time, now she's over a month old she's having growth spurts and starting to be a little more awake and cry more so I'm then having to figure out her needs and then Alfie's! Plus, it's while my attention is on Elarna that Alfie then decides to do something naughty knowing it'll be difficult for me to do something about it (clever little sausage that he is!). The naughty corner seems to be getting more use these days, I was reassured by the Health Visitor that things should improve by 6 weeks (wahoo, seriosuly, I hope!), I know that he's just attention seeking but it is hard to try not to scream and shout and the amount of times I'm saying no to him is unbelievable!



Just this morning this is the state of our downstairs (and yes he is still in his pj's!), Alfie decided that he wasn't getting enough attention and thought the best way to get some was to empty his toy box and throw the entire contents of his toy kitchen over the floor while hitting Daddy and our (glass) dining table with a wooden toy. You can find me mostly rocking in a corner today......or until Grandma and Grandad arrive and they can alleviate some of the angst!

I feel I'm running on empty already, the broken sleep and lack of food (which apparently is standard when looking after 2!) makes for one shattered and short tempered Mama, not to mention tests your relationship to your other half to the max! It all comes flooding back, the sleepless nights, the eating with one hand and the ability to identify what is a hunger/tired/poop cry and generally realising that other things will just have to take a back seat. The pecking order in this household is currently children, the cats, Mummy and then Daddy!

Alfie is a little hurricane, he doesn't nap during the day (he hasn't since about 18 months) and he is a super active little lad, this is both great and not so as he is on the go ALL day (seriously where does this boy get his energy from?), it's very tiring when he wants me to play with him or go in the garden when I've got a screaming newborn also kicking off! In a way I'm missing our one on one time and I'm hoping that soon I'll be able to give him a little more attention when Elarna settles into more of a routine. 


That being said he does appear to really love his little sister and I'm really loving those little moments that I am seeing, like before he goes to bed he gives Elarna a kiss on the head and says goodnight, he then gives me a cuddle and tells me he loves me, which after a hard and tiring day makes it all worth it and my heart does do a little jump, so cute. 

I know that it will get easier in time, I don't want to rush the newborn part as most of the time it's such a lovely stage to enjoy but I am looking forward to getting more sleep and being able to eat with two hands again!

It's still weird referring to myself as a Mum of 2, I almost don't feel grown up enough to be a Mum, I still feel 21......well ok maybe 25. I'm officially an adult, I'm getting old (boohoo!).

Is it too early for wine?!!

Please reassure me that it gets easier? I'm sure it does but some positive thoughts would be great right now!


MaternityMondays




Mummascribbles

26 comments:

  1. i only have one and she's nearly 2 so i know how demanding toddlers can be... i can only imagine how busy your day is with a newborn too...i think you're doing great! :) #mummymonday

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    1. Ahh thanks, I hope I'm doing great doesn't feel like it much at the moment but maybe in time I will :-) x

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  2. Thank you so much for the post :) x

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  3. aww I can't help but I feel for you remembering those early days. It was 6-8 weeks I remember getting our evenings back when Arianna went down. This too will pass but you are right...you want to remember the early days!! xx #mummymondays #maternitymondays

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    1. Yes it's a bit hit and miss at the moment, sometimes she will have a nice stretch of sleep in the evening other times (like tonight!) she won't!! X

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  4. I can relate to this post so much, my baby is now 16 months and is still so demanding and requires so much of my attention. I still find it so hard to divide myself and I constantly feel guilty that I'm not doing enough. It was just me and my daughter for 4 years so it was also a big shock. Luckily she is so good and is no trouble at all unlike her little brother. I have no idea how people cope with more than 2! They deserve a medal. Good luck with your 2, I'm hoping it gets easier at some point too :) #MummyMonday

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    1. They really do don't they, if I was ever to have another it's going to be a few years away that;s for sure! x

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  5. Ah we have a little whirlwind here too she literally never stops and never did the sleeping thing as a newborn either. We purposely havnt had anymore lo yet (shes 2 and a bit) because adding a newborn into the mix before now would just be too crazy for me lol. Hopefully in the coming months everything will get easier x

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    1. It's hard work isn't it, I remember vividly Alfie not sleeping much and she is clearly taking after her brother, it's like she doesn't want to miss a thing! #knackering xx

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  6. I can't really comment as our first is only 15 days old, but all ready people are asking if we are going to have another. Can I not enjoy this one first and get my head around to the ways in which our lived have changed? #maternitymonday #mummymonday

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    1. Oh my goodness, some people are mad aren't they, you of course want to enjoy this time before you even think about another! X

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  7. I can't say it gets easier in time. I think you will just get used to having two kids. When my youngest was newborn, she had colic. Every single night for a good few weeks she would break her heart crying 10pm until 1am. She has always been bad tempered and very demanding, she is 3 years old now and she is still bd tempered and demanding! I find her much harder to cope with now, than what she was when she ws new born! My eldest is 5 years old. x

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    1. Oh colic really isn't nice, poor little love. Thanks for the comment :-) X

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  8. I can only imagine how much hard work it is. But I am sure you will eventually get into a little routine and having two will probably not be easier but you will adapt and get used to it! Thanks for linking up #MummyMonday x

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    1. Ahh thanks, I'm sure we will it's just hard to adapt but I'm getting there slowly.Thanks for the comment X

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  9. Aww it's hard but I'm 3 months in now and it seems a bit easier now. However I'm under no illusions that it may change ;)

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    1. Fingers crossed Emma, I'll hold you to that hehe X

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  10. I am right there with you, pretty much bang on in fact with my second being 4 weeks! People keep telling me it gets easier too, I am sure it will and if not there is always wine and chocolate! #MaternityMondays

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    1. Yay for wine and chocolate!! Saviours for everything I think x

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  11. OMG! I got super tired after just reading your post!! I feel for you but I have zero advice. I've only got one, and I think that is really hard.

    All I can say, is hang in there? Ask the Grandparents to move in with you? Drink more wine?

    xo

    #TwinklyTuesday

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  12. I know how you feel, my baby is 9 weeks old and with a 3 and 5 year old as well life is tough at the moment. I found going from one to two children quite hard but two to three is easier though more demanding and everyone seems to miss out a bit as I just don't have enough hands. one the plus side it is great seeing the relationships develop between the children and how much the girls love their baby brother. i know it will get easier and I will look back and miss the early days in the meantime it is okay to live on toast and satsumas isn't it? #maternitymondays

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    1. Haha I'm living on less than that at the moment and my coffee is always tepid unless I down it in one, they tag team but would I change it? No I wouldn't hard as it is I'm amazed by my little family. Thanks for the comment! x

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  13. This too shall pass, I tell myself. I don't know anything about transitioning from one to two, but I imagine it's much harder than just having two at once. At least no one expected me to know what I was doing! Thank you for sharing what it's really like. Parenting isn't easy. Thanks for linking with #TwinklyTuesday.

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    1. Thanks for the comment Sadia, cor it is tough being a Mum isn't it!! You never know whether you're coming or going! x

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