Tuesday 7 November 2017

The Sleep Thief.

Quote by an unknown author: 'Mothers and fathers are part of a scientific experiment to prove that sleep is not a crucial part of human life'

04:00am

03:15am

01:30am. 


02:30am.

11:30pm.


These are all times I can see on a regular basis. Sometimes if we're lucky she might sleep until 5am....if it's a really good night, 6am. Read on......

The pitter patter of not so tiny feet.  As I prise my sleepy eyes open I'm greeted by my daughter, pretty much nose to nose with me. 'Mummy, wake up, Mummy, Mummy wake up , wake uppppp'. 

Dare I check the clock? 

As I glance to the clock in my sleepy haze and reach scrabble around for my glasses I wonder what ungodly hour it is tonight. 1am. Oh tonight it's really early. Fabulous. As I try and get my head into gear she's makes her way around the other side of the bed. 'Daddy, wake upppppppppp, wake UP!'. He stirs but tonight it's my turn to try and get her back to sleep. I consider putting her next to us both but past experience tells me this is a hugely bad idea. I take her back to bed. I put her back into bed 20 times in the next 2 1/2 hours. It slowly turned into a torturous experience, one long night. I have been left questioning  my parenting skill and have been left emotional, exhausted, grumpy and at times thinking I'm cracking up due to sleep deprivation. 

These  sleepless nights are a regular occurrence these days. Myself and my husband have become frequent members of the wide awake club thanks to our wonderful 2 year old daughter.  A few nights ago it took my poor husband 3 1/2 hours to convince her to go back to sleep, he's got so much more patience than me. In all honestly, its in fact been months since she properly slept through and we all had a decent sleep. Even when she does sleep through, often she will stir and become restless and most days she wakes between 5am and 6am. She's so different to Alfie he sleeps so well, often we have to wake him on a morning. It has been some what of a shock to the system. Sometimes she doesn't even get out of bed in the night, several times she's just sat up and started screaming fr us both, I've not sure which option I prefer!

I feel that this is our life now. Life with a non sleeping child. Where did it all go so wrong. Where did we mess up ? Is it something we've done fundamentally wrong or is it simply a case of having a child that doesn't sleep. Do we suck it up or can we do something to change her ways? 

We've tried so many things, sleeping next to her, bringing her into our bed, the gro clock, is she too hot, is she too cold, is she in pain, does she need more milk? Dummies? We've tried night lights, white noise, self settling, cuddling etc etc the list goes on. I just don't think we'll ever see the end of it at this rate. The health visitor was less than helpful...... advising me that lots of other parents have children that don't sleep. Marvellous, nice to know we're not alone great but hardly useful advice!


It's no wonder that sleep deprivation is used as a form of torture. The way it messes with your head. Daily functioning becomes an unbearable task, your eyes feel like they have glass in them and relationships suffer. I've been through some pretty rough nights when the kids were newborn which somehow seems alot  more acceptable when you've sort of prepared yourself for it and expect it but when it's a 2 year old that should be sleeping through it becomes much more challenging to accept it. It's not like we have mind numbing jobs either, both myself and my husband need to be on the ball when at work and need sleep to function so working on a minimal amount of sleep is tough. What is also hard is the impact it's had on Alfie. He's exhausted as he has a disrupted sleep and we then have less patience with him because we're tired. It's a horrible, vicious circle.  

Perhaps we'll turn a corner at some point soon? Who knows. For the moment we're just having to adjust our life slightly to accommodate our non sleeping daughter. 

Hello early bedtimes!! *sigh*

So if anyone has any advice that we've not already tried please get in touch!! Thankyou......from some very tired and sleepy parents.


12 comments:

  1. Reading this makes me feel so sad for you and your husband. We went through this until our boy was 4.5 :(
    My advice is- no talking to her, no eye contact, straight back to bed & repeat as needed.
    I know first hand how exhausting it is. I really & honestly hope it doesn't last as long for you as it did for us. The only way I coped in the end was sending my son to nursery for a few hours and napping while he was there.
    Sending you lots of strength, and sleepy thoughts to your daughter x

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  2. I sympathise so much with parents that have non sleeping kids. I love my sleep so much and just last night Pops randomly woke at 12am crying which is very rare and I was like urgh! I hope Elarna grows out of it soon as even though you must get used to it to a certain extent it must be so exhausting! Thanks for hosting #bloggersbest

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  3. I'm not a mom but I've learned a few things since moving to WA state. Due to the lack of sunlight and perpetually grey days, many kids around here have trouble sleeping. Many of our doctors recommend melatonin capsules before bedtime. It is supposed to be safe and is something your body produces naturally as the sunlight fades each day - which means your body has trouble producing it in certain geographical areas. Not sure if that will help, but I hope you all get some sleep soon! #BloggersBest

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  4. I’m so sorry to hear that you are so sleep deprived! I do remember it well and you just feel half dead all the time! Honestly, it is just a phase that I’m sure she will grow out of.....I know you old slap me right now but it’s true! I would echo what Keri above says.....sleep training essentially. Lovely sleep routine, bath, book, cuddle, bed. Keep putting her back to bed, no fuss, keep calm, no eye contact saying the same words...it’s bedtime. You think you’re going mad after the first 3 hours but stick to it and after about a week (or less if you are SuperNannie) she will start to sleep hopefully. Good luck. Xx

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  5. Go hun this is awful. I didn't know still was so bad. The gremlin started waking after she hot 18months-2 but not like this. Hugs. Wish could magic a wand and hope she settles soon xx

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  6. Oh love, this sounds horrendous. I can remember going through something similar (although not as bad). I just hope it ends soon and it's just a phase. #bloggingbest

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  7. Hi, I love the title, sadly it is far a gereat position to be in. I hope that you all get into a good and healthy sleep routine soon #bloggersbest

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  8. Oh gosh, not getting enough sleep really is a form of torture. It affects you so much! I really hope your little one either grows out of it soon, or you find something that helps a lot! #bloggersbest

    -lauren
    www.shootingstarsmag.net

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  9. Have you heard of the Cheshire Baby Whisperer? https://cheshirebabywhisperer.com

    When my husband started working in London in the week, I thought I was going to die from all of Henry's wake ups. Evelyn came highly recommended from so many women at work, that I had to call her for a consultation. Unfortunately I didn't live local for her to come out to me, but over Skype and over the phone, she got Henry sleeping right through in 2 nights. Not going to lie, they were bloody tough nights, but once you are exhausted, you will do anything. She is worth a contact. She also has a book which will help.

    One day it will all just change and these sleepless nights will be forgotten. Then she will bring a boyfriend home, haha x #bloggersbest x

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  10. Oh my this sounds awful. Poor you! It sounds like you’ve tried so much already and I’m desperate need of sleep. All I can suggest is not talking to her or making eye contact when she wakes up. Also I think I read somewhere about low blood sugar in the middle of the night waking you up. Maybe see what a doctor says as might even be a vitamin deficiency that’s stoppinf her from falling asleep? Good luck and hope you all manage to get some much needed rest soon. #bloggersbest

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  11. It is tough when you get broken sleep and it continues over a period of time. I hope the sitation improves X #bloggesbest

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  12. Sleep deprivation is so tough. We have had out bad patches but - touch wood - they all sleep through at the moment! #bloggersbest

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