Wednesday 28 January 2015

The Up the Nose Incident.

Well I suppose it was bound to happen sooner or later but today was the day Alfie decided to experiment with sticking items up his nose (marvellous, another milestone in parenthood achieved!). Cue manic panic and stressing from Mummy about what on earth had been shoved up there, whether there was still anything stuck up there and what else has he poked into this orifice?. 

I will set the scene, as I was merrily washing up Alfie went suspiciously quiet, when children go quiet you never notice right away, it's usually a couple of minutes before you start thinking why is my child so quiet and what is my child doing ?! On this instance I thought he was just chilling on the sofa having some snacks when actually what he was doing was seeing how far snacks can go up each nostril, wahhhh!

Pretty much my actual reaction.





Image courtesy of Playbuzz.com 
To be truthful, initially I was unaware that he'd been experimenting. The conversation went something along these lines.....

Alfie:  'Mummy I got things up nose'

Mummy: 'I'm sorry what Alfie???'

Alfie, 'I stuck things up nose'

Mummy: 'Oh Christ'.

It was only then that he kind of snorted and snotted a little fruity button out of his nose (you know the ones that look like Jelly Tots but the healthy variety, little round pieces that are just inviting themselves to be shoved up a toddler's nostril or in an ear). Out came one sticky, snotty and resembling a huge bogey fruity piece. Me: panic, panic, panic. THEN out came another, arghhhh! At this point I had no idea how many were up each nostril, Alfie seemed to find my reaction most amusing, brilliant! The following conversation then took place.

Mummy: 'Alfie is there anymore up your nose?'

Alfie: 'Yes Mummy' *snorts*

Mummy: 'Don't snort!! Adiiiiiiiiiiiii (my husband), he's only bloody got these damn fruit things stuck up his nose, help me!!!'

Husband: 'WHAT????'. Typical male response.

So there I am 6 months pregnant trundling up the stairs with a toddler in arm hoping for some moral support from my husband who to begin with was fairly calm until he realised what exactly I was telling him.

Mummy: 'Our dear child has been shoving things up his nose, I've no idea how many and if there is anything still up there!'

Husband: 'Oh crap'

We sat Alfie on the sofa and in a scene that resembled a comedy sketch got him to snort out of each nostril to try and dislodge anything that might be up there. The whole concept of trying to get a toddler who doesn't really have a clue what you're asking of him an interesting notion. To Alfie this was one big game! The only thing that seemed to appear out of said orifice  was copious amounts of snot and  thankfully no fruity buttons at this point.

Daddy: 'Alfie have you got anything up your nose? Is it ouchy?''

Alfie: 'Yes'.

Mummy and Daddy: *groan*.

Daddy: 'Alfie can you blow your nose like Daddy?' *snorrttttttt*

Alfie: 'Yes' *snoorrttt*

Unclear as to whether anything was actually still up there we proceeded to consult 'Dr. Google' (yes I know I'm a Nurse but sometimes Dr. Google helps!), Dr. Google didn't really help that much it was more common sense so we then continued this comedy sketch and got Alfie into all sorts of positions to try and see up his nose and using a torch on our phone tried to investigate the orifice's to see if we could see anything. We couldn't, we were fairly sure there wasn't anymore there.

Daddy: 'Alfie have you got anything stuck up your nose?'

Alfie: 'No Daddy' *trots off and plays with toys*

Mummy and Daddy then exchange a look which I'm sure all parents are aware off, the he's having us on look!

In reality it was another valuable parenting lesson learnt, of course I knew that he was going to start sticking things in his nose, ears etc etc. This time we were lucky and it was easily resolved but it so easily  could have been something alot more serious potentially could have resulted in afternoon spent in A&E.

Lesson learned. Toddlers experiment. Toddlers like to stick things in places they shouldn't. Once again I panicked, but it's ok that's what Mummy's are supposed to do! Not that it takes much reminding but children are precious and simple things such as food can pose a risk to toddlers enquiring minds and experimental nature (even though he found the whole thing hilarious). Lesson learned.



Best of Worst

42 comments:

  1. This is bloody hilarious!! Ace post xx

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  2. This was obviously quite worrying for you and quite right too, but it makes a great read for us.

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  3. Aww bless him. I can't remember Stacey doing anything like this when she was a toddler but I'm sure that Oscar will as he has a totally different personality!!

    Louise x

    Confessions of a Secret Shopper

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    1. Definitely going to be keeping a closer eye on him with small food items now! x

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  4. LOL. I clearly remember my brother's childhood friend doing this with pussywillow blooms. Maybe not so fun at the moment, but definitely something to laugh about later. And I sure hope I won't have to deal with this in the near future...but who am I kidding?!

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    1. Oh no! It was quite funny after, I just dis the typical panicky Mummy thing, thankfully all ok though X

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  5. hahaha!! Ohh dear! My girls have never put anything up their nose....I would panic if they did. lol

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    1. Thanks for your comment Kim, I'm sure we're going to lots of other crazy incidents as he becomes more experimental! x

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  6. Haha! Mine thankfully never really did this, but I can imagine having the same sort of scenario as you if they did!

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    1. You're lucky with boys Carly, I'm just wondering what on earth will happen next! x

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  7. Haha! Aaaw I don't know if I have to laugh or not. I have a 3 year old and I hope she won't put things up her nose...I might just faint instead of dealing it. lol

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    1. Haha thanks for the comment Melody! Fingers crossed that she doesn't put anything up her nose :-) xx

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  8. Haha! My girls have never stuck things up their nose, but my husband told me when he was younger he stuck a toy soldier up his! #bestandworst

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  9. This has made me giggle. They are little monkeys, aren't they? You dealt with it very professionally! My daughter has yet to do this but they do like to experiment so will keep an eye out! #bestandworst

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    1. Aren't they just, even now I remember thinking uh oh, this is so not good! Now we've ventured into the world of Lego I'm anticipating Lego stuck in various places! Eek. x

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  10. Oh that's hilarious.Sorry!Always whilst washing up isn't it!Good excuse not to do it if you ask me!!!Glad he's ok though xx #bestandworst

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  11. So pleased I missed out on that particular motherhood experience! Thanks for the laugh and am pleased it turned out not to be serious. #bestandworst

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  12. I remember this one!! So funny #bestandworst x

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  13. Ah memories! My eldest boy had a penchant for stuffing things up his nose - twice had to have things removed under a general anaesthetic and another two times without! He did eventually grow out of it haha

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    1. Oh god!! That's my worst nightmare, they are sods for it! x

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  14. I think all kids do this at some point. I was lucky that my daughter used cherrios so they melted pretty quickly. I can tell you she never did it again.

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  15. Every parent's nightmare! So glad the little guy is ok now!

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    1. Yes thankfully he was ok, who knows what the next incident will be! x

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  16. This is one of those that's horrifying at the time, but pretty funny after - it certainly made a hilarious blog post! Thanks for hosting #bestandworst :)
    Debbie
    www.myrandommusings.blogspot.com

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  17. My mom is an ETN doctor and she's always told me how often this happens :)

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  18. AHHHHHH DRAMA! What a nightmare! So glad everything was okay after all of the frantic behaviours haha My niece put a bead up her nose at the weekend and it was pretty mental too! #Bestandworst x

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  19. After reading this post I feel I am slightly more prepared. I love your husbands initial response. Made me laugh as mine would say exactly the same thing....and then add "weren't you watching him!" Typical! #bestandworst

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  20. Oh my word! Although this is funny now, I'm sure it wasn't at the time! Glad the nose got sorted and I'm glad I've avoided this so far with my Harry! :) x #BestAndWorst

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    1. Yes, I'm a bit more prepared now for this kind of thing happening! x

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  21. Eeek haha! This made me giggle although I'm sure it wasn't funny when it was happening. Glad he is ok :) #bestandworst xx

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